Yes! We Have No Bananas Today

There's a fruit store on our street

It's run by a Greek

And he keeps good things to eat But you should hear him speak! 

When you ask him anything, he never answers "no"

He just "yes"es you to death, and as he takes your dough He tells you

"Yes, we have no bananas

We have-a no bananas today

We've string beans, and onions

Cabashes, and scallions, 

And all sorts of fruit and say

We have an old fashioned tomato

Long Island potato But yes, we have no bananas

We have no bananas today

Business got so good for him that he wrote home today, 

"Send me Pete and Nick and Jim; I need help right away"

When he got them in the store, there was fun, you bet

Someone asked for "sparrow grass" and then the whole quartet

All answered "Yes, we have no bananas

We have-a no bananas today

Just try those coconuts

Those wall-nuts and doughnuts

There ain't many nuts like they

We'll sell you two kinds of red herring, 

Dark brown, and ball-bearing

But yes, we have no bananas

We have no bananas today"

He, he, he, he, ha, ha, ha whatta you laugh at? 

You gotta soup or pie? 

Yes, I don't think we got soup or pie

You gotta coconut pie? 

Yes, I don't think we got coconut pie

Well I'll have one cup a coffee

We gotta no coffee

Then watta you got? 

I got a banana! 

Oh you've got a banana! 

Yes, we gotta no banana, No banana, No banana, I tell you we gotta no banana today

I sella you no banana

Hey, Mary Anna, you gotta... gotta no banana? 

Why this man, he's no believe-a what I say… no… he no believe me…

Now whatta you wanta mister? You wanna buy twelve for a quarter? 

Well, just a one of a look, I'm gonna call for my daughter

Hey, Mary Anna You gotta piana

Yes, a banana, no

Yes, we gotta no bananas today! 

The new English "clark" (a.k.a. "clerk"):

Yes, we are very sorry to inform you

That we are entirely out of the fruit in question

The afore-mentioned vegetable Bearing the cognomen "Banana"

We might induce you to accept a substitute less desirable, 

But that is not the policy at this internationally famous green grocery

I should say not. No no no no no no no

But may we suggest that you sample our five o'clock tea

Which we feel certain will tempt your pallet? 

However we regret that after a diligent search

Of the premises By our entire staff

We can positively affirm without fear of contradiction

That our raspberries are delicious; really delicious

Very delicious But we have no bananas today.