My kindness was a big mistake

Waking up right next to you
Is the last thing that I want to do
Knowing you dont care
Cause youre spineless and too much to take
And my kindness was a big mistake
It gets me nowhere
And Ive been reading through your letters
Hoping that youd never make up your mind
And I wish I was a boy again
Where I could still pretend you were mine

Im drinking too much these days it never seems to help
Cause you say Ill never change
And that Im the only one who I care about when you say

That youre leaving and youre ready to go
Cause you thought I was cheating
But I dont think you want to know
Well I think that things are better this way
When it seems like youre breathing
But youre already dead to me

Making up my mind on you
Is something I wish I could do
But youre so [bad word] thoughtless and Im not going to lose
To any of these games you play
Cause no one likes you anyway
Youre just a faceless name
So what will you say
When I tell you that your lifes like a book
Its torn and tattered sitting on a shelf
Where no one wants to look

And it seems
That this is what we want
As your face begins to haunt my memories
And seep into my future dreams
Where no one can hear you scream