Oblivious To The Obvious

Part 1
 NO CHANCE

 He was never there for me
 He rarely looked my way
 When he’d come home tired from work
He never had a thing to say

And if he ever spoke to me
It was always in anger
 When I tried to speak to him
He’d treat me like a stranger

 What kind of father hits his son,
 Takes out his pain on everyone?
 Thinks only of himself, like he’s the only one
 Who exists in the world that needs someone 

What chance did I have 
 Of turning out right?
 I never learned a thing at home
 That could help me with my life
 Always being yelled at
 And deprived of any fun
 That childhood should consist of
 Never loved by anyone 

She always shot me down
 With a bullet from her mouth
 She made me feel so guilty
 If I wanted to leave the house 

She’d disregard everyone
 In a power-hungry spree
 Clean the house like a psycho
 Driven by her OCD 

What kind of mother neglects her son,
 Puts down her child, says he’s no one?
 Thinks only of herself and if her house is clean
 Wants nothing more than status and prestige 

What chance did I have 
 Of turning out right?
 I never learned a thing at home
 That could help me with my life
 Always being yelled at
 And deprived of any fun
 That childhood should consist of
 Never loved by anyone 

No chance of having self-esteem
 No chance when rage is a constant theme
 No chance of showing love for their son
 No chance when they think about themselves or else no one
 No chance when innocence is reviled
 No chance when blame is placed upon a child
 No chance if good examples can’t be found
 No chance if parents do not want to be around 

Part 2
 REALIZATION 

The news dropped like a bomb
 And I felt numb inside
 How could I get cancer?
 I pleaded for God to give me an answer 

The diagnosis compelled me
 To look back at my life
 What I saw brought sorrow
 troubled past and a bleak tomorrow 

My life is such a tragedy
 The common theme is misery
 Now my end is drawing near
 They say I’ll die within the year 

I look inside and see my parents’ ghosts
 I’ve become the thing I hated most
 The pain is tearing me in two
 The guilt is burning me right through 

Why did it take something like this
 To make me realize I’m just like them?
 I treat my kids unfairly, I know them just barely
 I’ve never shown caring, I’m sure that they hate me 

I look inside and see my parents’ ghosts
 I’ve become the thing I hated most
 The pain is tearing me in two
 The guilt is burning me right through 

Is it too late to make amends?
 Is it too late to forgive my sins?
 Will my kids even care when I’m dead?
 I ever a thought in their heads? 

Part 3
 REMEMBER ME 

I know that I’m committed to change
 Change is something that will take time
 Time is stealing away from me
 My chance to become what I should be
 My chance to become 

I don’t have time
 To gain their trust
 I want to prove
 They have my love
 I hope my death
 Will make them weep
 But I fear their wounds
 Have run too deep 

Time is against me
 They’re better off without me
 But before I meet my death
 I will use my every breath
 To tell them I was wrong
 And to change who I’ve become
 So that when I’m gone
 Someone will remember me 

I asked each one for their forgiveness
 I acknowledged that I had failed them all
 I have to mend the damage caused
 But change takes longer than I thought
 But change takes so long 

I don’t have strength
 To give enough
 I want to show
 I’m serious
 I hope my life
 Is far from gone
 But I fear my chance
 Has been withdrawn 

Time is against me
 They’re better off without me
 But before I meet my death
 I will use my every breath
 To tell them I was wrong
 And to change who I’ve become
 So t