Captain Kelly's Kitchen

Come single guy and gal unto me pay attention 
Don't ever fall in love 
It's the devil's own invention 
For once he fell in love with a maiden so bewitching 
Miss Henrietta Bell down in Captain Kelly's kitchen 

[Chorus:] 
With me toora loora la, me toora loora laddie 
Me toora loora la and me toora loora laddie 

At the age of seventeen I apprenticed to a grocer 
Not far from Stephen's Green 
Where Miss Henri' used to go sir 
Her manners were sublime she set my heart a-twitchin' 
When she invited me to a party in the kitchen 

[Chorus] 

Sunday was the day that they were to have their flare-up 
He dressed himself quite [bad word] 
I frizzed and oiled my hair up 
The Captain had no wife and he had gone a-fishin' 
She groped me on the stairs beneath the old man's kitchen 

[Chorus] 

Her arms around my waist she slyly hinted marriage 
When to the door in haste came Captain Kelly's carriage 
Her eyes were full of hate and poison she was spittin' 
The Captain kicked the door in and stormed into the kitchen 

[Chorus] 

When the Captain came downstairs he saw my situation 
In spite of all his prayers he was marched off to the station 
For him they'd take no bail 
To get home I was itchin' 
He had to tell the tale how I came into the kitchen 

[Chorus] 

I said she did invite me 
But she gave flat denial 
For assault she did indict me and I was sent for trial 
She swore he'd robbed her house 
In spite of all her screechin' 
I got six months hard 
For his courtin' in the kitchen 

[Chorus]