Baton Rouge

When I think of you, Baton Rouge
I think of a Mariachi band
I think of sixteen and a crisp green football field
I think of a girl, I never had

When I think of you, Baton Rouge
I think of a back seat in a car
Windows are foggy and so are we
As the police asked for our I. D.

So helpless, so helpless
Ooh, ooh, so helpless
Ooh, so helpless
Ooh, so helpless
So helpless

Well, I once had a car, lost it in a divorce
The judge was a woman of course
She said, "Give her the car and the house and your taste
Or else I set the trial date"

So now when I think of you, Baton Rouge
And the deep southern belles with their touch
I wonder where love ends and hate starts to blush
In the fields in the swamps in [bad word] 

In the terra-cotta cobwebs of your mind
When did you start seein', me as a spider spinning web?
Of malicious intent and you as poor, poor me
At the fire at the joint, this disinterred and broken mount
In the bedroom in the house where we were unmarried

So helpless, so helpless
So helpless
So helpless, so helpless
So helpless

When was I the villain in your heart
Putting the brake on your start
You slapped my face and cried and screamed
That's what marriage came to mean
The bitterest ending of a dream

You wanted children and I did not
Was that what it was all about?
You might get a laugh when you hear me shout
You might get a laugh when you hear me shout
I wish I had

So helpless, so helpless
So helpless
So helpless, so helpless
So helpless

Sometimes when I think of Baton Rouge
I see us with two and a half strapping sons
One and a half flushed daughters preparing to marry
And two fat grandsons I can barely carry

Daddy, uncle, family gathered there for grace
dog in a barbecue pit goes up in space
The dream recedes in the morning with a bad aftertaste
And I'm back in the big city worn from the race of the chase
What a waste

So thanks for the card the announcement of child
And I must say you and Sam look great
Your daughter's gleaming in that
White wedding dress with pride
Sad to say, "I could never bring that to you that wide smile"

So I try not to think of Baton Rouge
Or of a, of a, of a Mariachi band
Or of sixteen and a crisp green football field
And the girl, and the girl I never had

So helpless, so helpless
So helpless
So helpless, so helpless
So helpless