I Lost Myself Again

I heard you scream from the other side of the house 
I still can feel you shaking in my thoughts 
And now you're broken 
But I am broken too 
I miss the days when we were young and you would shine 

I know that I have tried to be a better man 

There is nothing [bad word] through these veins anymore 
There in nothing [bad word] through these veins anymore 

Who am I 
I thought the thoughts in my head would clarify 
All the reasons why I can't always say the things I need to say to you 
So I ran away just like I always do 

I remember the day that I gave up 
I lost myself, I lost myself again 
Because I've lived and died watching the wither in your eyes 
In your eyes 

And I don't think I've ever loved anything more 
Than the thought of growing old and loved 
But the thought of waking up with nothing left and everything you know and love is gone 
It scares me to think that I am young 
And I've had to watch you break 
So I learned how to ache like it was the only thing that I would ever know 

Now all that I have left is this lump in my throat and the bags under my eyes 
And now I know what giving up really feels like 

There is nothing [bad word] through these veins anymore