The Best Of Both Worlds

[Intro speaking part]
'It's Chris Crocker..
(It's so hard to play guitar with these press-on nails!)'

[Verse 1]
What is gonna happen when my legs are uncrossed?
Just like New York City, oh, the ball's gonna drop..
All these men keep staring, but I'm just a big fraud..
(I am missing misleading and I will never get caught)

[Hook]
DO ya want THIS? (want it, want it)
DO ya want CHRIS? (want it, want it)

Now I'm gettin' rowdy as my knees hit the ground
He never knew what hit him when the lights were kept down..

 [bad word] 
I'm flirtin' with his world
He thinks I'm his girl,
but there's more than meets the eye
Football and shiny pearls..
It's the best of both worlds
And it's all between my thighs..

[Verse 2]
Let's go to a church and then I'll show them my split..
(I will pray to God that they don't see this ___ ___ )
Twirlin' my blonde hair
Girls like me are everywhere..
(Damsels in distress with some more flesh and more flare)

[Hook]
DO ya want THIS? (want it, want it)
Do you want CHRIS? (want it, want it)

..Now I'm gettin' pouty as my knees hit the ground
He never knew what BIT him..
Turn that frown upside down..
[Repeat [bad word] 
I'm just another.. hopeless romantic
Using my ploys to get the boys
What's the difference if you find me attractive?
Ask yourself what you want..

[Repeat [bad word] 
I'm flirtin' with his world
He thinks I'm his girl,
but there's more than meets the eye
Football and shiny pearls..
It's the best of both worlds-
And it's all between my thighs..