The President's Penis is Missing

They looked in the White House and Capitol Hill
They looked everywhere for Buffalo Bill
We called every scholar, reporter and genius
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word] 

It ain't in the White House or Judiciary
It ain't in the Smithsonian or that big ole library
An astronomer claims it was sighted on Venus
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word] 

The President's [bad word] is missing, ole
We searched high and low, every night, everyday
Lord, won't [bad word] down and redeem us
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word] 

Now Presidents have goofed up in all kinds of ways
In the 80's we elected one or two missing their brains
And George Washington caught a cold, he couldn't quite explain
We all just learned the [bad word] about Thomas Jefferson's name

And Franklin D. Roosevelt wasn't no square
With that raging Woodrow in his wheelchair
And all the lesbians snickered that Elenore didn't care
And John Kennedy's [bad word] was seen everywhere

The President's [bad word] is missing, ole
We searched high and low, every night, everyday
Lord, won't [bad word] down and redeem us
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word] 

Them outer space people would laugh if they'd seen us
All this talk about [bad word] stains and oral coitus
Meanwhile the whole world suffers from hunger and meanness
But we're more concerned with the President's [bad word] 

The President's [bad word] is missing, ole
We searched high and low, every night, everyday
Lord, won't [bad word] down and redeem us
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word] 

Lord, won't [bad word] down and redeem us
Has anyone seen the President's [bad word]